WORMHOLE
EXPRESS
"It was late yesterday."
The universe's most exclusive temporal relocation service.
One-way tickets to any point in history. Discretion guaranteed. Returns possible not included.
*By design. Not a flaw.
THE COMPANY
The following materials are excerpted from the standard employee orientation package. Reading is mandatory. Comprehension is expected. Retention is not guaranteed — we have found it does not correlate with performance.
Our Founder
Wormhole Express was conceived, built, and subsequently inherited by two men with the same surname and entirely different relationships with risk.
Ing. Radoslav Novák was born in Ostrava, Czech Republic, in 2029. He spent the first decade of his career developing experimental propulsion systems for deep-space vessels. He spent the second decade of his career deciding that space was cold, funding was unreliable, and there was more money in skincare.
This conclusion was not unreasonable. By 2058, accelerating climate degradation had produced, among other things, a population of highly adaptive mutant snails in the lowlands of Central Europe. These snails secreted a fluid with remarkable dermal regeneration properties. Novák established a farm. He called the fluid Quantum Milt — "Quantum" because it sounded credible, and "Milt" because he was in a hurry when he filed the trademark.
He sold milt to wealthy clients seeking younger skin. He made considerable money. He was not satisfied. He was never satisfied. This is what made him exceptional and also extremely difficult to work with.
HOW YOU RUN THIS
No shifts. No closing time. The operation runs continuously and the queue never empties. Your job is to process clients, manage the milt supply, contain anomalies, and keep the business solvent — indefinitely.
Client Intake
A client arrives and waits at the Info Point. You open the control panel, assign a Quantum Shower stall, and set the temporal destination — down to seconds, minutes, hours, years.
Milt Application
The client enters the shower. Quantum Milt is sprayed at calibrated thickness — coating depth equals destination year. Precision and speed both matter for your performance metrics.
Temporal Dispatch
Client crosses the Grey Hole membrane and is sent into the past. Destinations too unstable or paradox-prone can be refused — at a cost to your reputation.
Timeline Disturbance
Every dispatch ripples through the timeline. New anomalies register on the Anomaly Manager. The longer they sit unresolved, the more they cost — in credits and reputation.
Milt Supply Management
- ›Monitor stock levels at the Milt Point — zero stock = full operational halt
- ›Order refills via Order Place — scroll to set barrel count, click to confirm
- ›Barrels arrive after a random delay, fired through the Grey Hole
- ›Carry barrels to the Milt Point and dock them in the designated zone
- ›Sell empty barrels at the Sell Point for a fixed credit return
⚠ Running dry mid-shift is not a theoretical risk. Plan ahead or plan to apologize.
Anomaly Management
- ›Alarm triggers on new anomaly or incoming barrel delivery — same alarm, different panic
- ›Navigate to the Anomaly Manager and click Resolve to neutralize the disturbance
- ›Resolution costs credits — delay multiplies the price
- ›Unresolved anomalies erode reputation and bleed your operating balance
- ›High anomaly loads can open the portal to something worse (see: Roadmap)
⚠ Anomalies are not optional paperwork. Ignoring them is a business model with a very short runway.
Economics of Time
- ›Income: client dispatch fees + empty barrel sales
- ›Expenditure: milt orders + anomaly resolution costs
- ›Reputation affects client volume and available operational features
- ›Refusing clients protects stability but shrinks your queue — and your margins
- ›No win condition. No closing time. Survive, optimise, repeat.
⚠ The operation runs indefinitely. Your job is to keep it running better than yesterday.
WHAT'S COMING
Cargo & Parcels
Shipping isn't just for people. Accept parcel contracts — packages, artefacts, and occasionally things that shouldn't exist yet. Different milt ratios apply.
Base Customisation
Reconfigure your entire facility layout. Expand shower capacity, reposition workstations, optimise client flow. Your warehouse, your rules.
Crafting System
Craft tools, equipment, and facility upgrades to improve throughput, milt efficiency, and anomaly containment. Blueprints must be sourced — some from the past.
Anomaly Incursions
Leave too many anomalies open and the Grey Hole becomes a two-way door. Temporal creatures will breach the facility. You will need to deal with them before they deal with the operation.
Agent-in-the-Past Mode
Agents travel into the past with limited resources and a mandate: build a Wormhole Express branch from nothing. Source materials from the era, recruit historical workers, establish operations — before the timeline closes.
IN OPERATION
Actual footage from the facility. No actors. No post-production. One active Grey Hole, several anomalies, and a client named Melon Husk who keeps coming back.
RISK MANAGEMENT
Our temporal communication wall — messages from clients preserved in Quantum Milt and posted to this board for internal review. All complaints have been addressed filed.
You told me toga was 'appropriate attire for the period'. Nobody mentioned the KNIVES. Where is my refund? — Julius
You bastard, I'm coming for your grandma! I specifically requested 'scenic countryside' not 'active monastery raid'!!
WHY IS EVERYONE SICK. I paid for the Italian Renaissance. This is NOT the Renaissance. Call me back. I have symptoms.
The Titanic experience was NOT listed as optional. When you said 'premium ocean crossing' I assumed the ship FLOATED.
Met myself. Gave him the brochure like instructed. He punched me. I punched me back. Your legal team said this was 'within expected parameters'. OUTRAGEOUS.
Listen, the kite experiment was MY idea. Stop claiming credit for electricity. I have witnesses. Also the milt smelled like cheese.
The 'Dinosaur Package' brochure said 'observe from a safe distance'. There is no safe distance. I am being observed right now. Send he
Inflation was indeed 'historically significant' as described. A billion marks for a loaf of bread is NOT what I meant by 'investment opportunity'. My portfolio is ruined.
You sent me to Pompeii. POMPEII. The volcano part was NOT in the brochure. I want to speak to the manager. I want to speak to the manager RIGHT NOW.
Displaying 9 of 4,200+ received communications. Remainder stored in secure temporal vault. Access requires Tier-3 clearance or above.
JOIN THE OPERATION
Play on itch.io
The prototype is live. Free to play. No milt required on your end.
Official Discord
Devlog updates, bug reports, and temporal incident discussions.
FOLLOW THE
TIMELINE
Register your correspondence address to receive transmissions from our development timeline — prototype updates, patch notes, and classified incident reports as the game progresses toward full temporal deployment.
⚡ Prototype available now on itch.io — full release TBD by temporal committee